Executive Function Getting You Down?

by AliciaS · September 20, 2018

Do you know what executive function is? I’ll be honest, lots of people don’t and you usually only know the term after it’s a problem. When it’s a problem it’s a BIG problem, a parental tear your hair out nightmare. SO first, let me explain executive function, then I’ll tell you WHY I’m talking about executive function.

Executive function is pretty much the ability to get stuff done. How to tackle a task, how to break down a project, how to focus and remember what you need to do, it’s all executive function. Kids, and adults, with ADHD and autism spectrum disorders tend to struggle with this. Even neurotypical kids can deal with Executive Function issues. I’ve mentioned my struggles with cleaning, organizing, managing life, and it’s all issues with my executive function. If you, or your kid, struggle, it affects you every day. Most adults have found coping strategies and methods, or they just drink and live a hot mess kinda life, but we can help kids to improve this function, and we can find ways to improve it in ourselves.

So, I’m telling you this because earlier this year I got a preview copy of an amazing book about helping your child with executive function issues. Now that school is rolling along, maybe you’re really facing this struggles day to day. I know even as homeschoolers we struggle SO much more with this during the school year than we do during the summer. I already suggested this book to several friends (one of which even immediately bought it on her kindle to start using it.)

Why I Love It:

There are two main things I love about this book.

It’s written by someone who knows
It’s written in an easy to use way

Michael Delman, the author, runs an Executive Coaching company. These are methods he has used, with success, countless times. He knows what he’s doing and how to work with specific EF issues. I can’t even tell you how many times I got excited about a book about cleaning, or organizing, or getting your life together, only to realize the person was clueless. Michael is NOT clueless.

The book is chock FULL of helpful stuff, which would be completely overwhelming, BUT it’s also broken down into easy “if this- do that” sections. Some sections include “something to try when learning about your child’s interests,” “something to try when your child says ‘no’,” “something to try when your child needs help starting work at the right time,” and even “something to try to help your child learn how to learn,” (I need to reread that one!) among countless more! The book addresses everything from disorganization to screentime to note taking, all in perfect little chunks.

Let’s be totally honest here-if your child has executive function struggles you probably spend to much time managing them and being their brain to also read an remember a book full of tips. So the break down of sections is really important here.

What About Homeschoolers?

I’ll be honest, as a homeschooler my big thing was “what if we just don’t do that?” In my state, we don’t have to do book reports, or timed projects, or other classic school struggles. If it’s a struggle and I don’t have to my general inclination is to just skip it, but I have often wondered if that is the right choice. I was able to ask Michael that question and this is his response:

“Unlike schools where curricula are based on many complex factors – from politics down to testability – homeschooling provides unparalleled opportunities in allowing students to learn material that interests them the most and in the ways that suit them best. That said, our children grow and gain by learning to master challenges and also by studying material they don’t immediately find interesting. The approach I recommend is to provide exposure, encouragement, and choice. With exposure and encouragement – to material that initially seems dull, for example – our kids may well get past their initial reactions and end up appreciating a subject or topic that they hadn’t even imagined liking. That sort of experience provides a reference point for the future, reminding them that a certain degree of exposure and persistence may be necessary before they can make a good judgment. It also shows them the value of persistence. I want to respect kids’ ability to make decisions for themselves, giving them more latitude as they get older and have had a reasonable amount of exposure, enough to make that informed decision.”
Michael Delman